The snow geese called from above, getting my two puppies all excited. The two looked around and barked back at the unseen creatures passing by only as shadows on the ground. I looked up and watched the 50th flock fly back south for the umpteenth time, as my neighbour commented about the direction they were going.
“Still winter,” he grumbled. “Geese are heading south ‘cause there isn’t anything for them to eat and everything’s still frozen,” he added. I scratched my goose-break bearded stubble and agreed. Yeah, what happened to global warming? Isn’t it supposed to be bikini time by now? Last year, the snow and ice had disappeared in the first week of May and people were thoroughly exhausted with the heat by June. Strange times indeed.
Then I remembered a bit of early-morning advice I got from a Montreal cab driver while heading to the airport to a catch a flight back north. According to him, the ice melting off the glaciers in Greenland would cool off the waters around the massive island enough to change the direction of the warm-water currents of the Gulf Stream, the very waters that help warm up the northern European countries and good old Scotland itself, pushing warmer weather patterns further south. This in turn, would cool off the north so much that the entire North American continent is in danger of, yes, another ice age. I sipped the hot cup of Tim Hortons java to make sure that I heard right, did he say ice age?
Thinking about that theory for a while, I wondered if cab drivers really do have access to information that would affect entire civilizations. I asked the cabby where he got his information and whether he could validate it. He turned and looked at me and said very seriously, “I used to be a meteorologist” —which is a fancy word for weatherman.
Hmmm, I wonder, why is he driving a taxi now. Were his weather predictions so far off of the mark that the general public complained, or were his forecasts a bit too far ranged to qualify for this afternoon’s brisk winds and 60% chance of snow in July? Whatever the forecast, I just wished that spring could arrive at least by mid-June.
My new cellphone rang deep in my pocket. It was a traveler on Air Creebec, who told me that it was t-shirt weather in Chisasibi, and at every stop down to Montreal, the calls came in with a new temperature reading. God, why are we the only ones still with snow and ice?
Pushing the snow off the hood of the vehicle, I head to the only restaurant in town, and bump into another grumbler, who stated that the last time this mini ice age happened was in 1958. Wow, a half century ago!! Was I around? No! I think I was just a dirty thought back then, but I recall hearing the following summer in 1959 was the hottest recorded season. So is this just a flashback or is this cyclical?
Coming out of the restaurant, the rain came down just like it was supposed to a month ago and fog started forming. Great, I thought, the sun just can’t make it through this dreary morning. I check my non-existent tan lines, regretting all my own grumbles last year about the heat wave that passed through in May and June. What the heck, can’t do anything about that except perhaps turn off the idling vehicles or use less plastic, or change my refrigerator. Perhaps next issue, I won’t be so cold-hearted and talk about warmer issues.