Often I get ideas for this column from events and things that happen around me. There is a wedding coming up in my family. My cousin Irene Rose Is going to marry a young man by the name of Ashley Allard. They are currently living and working in Wemindji, a community on the east side of James Bay. This upcoming event got me to thinking about weddings in a Native way.
Tonight, when I talked over the telephone to my dad up in Attawapiskat, I learned that many of the women in the family have already flown ahead to Wemindji to help with this festive event. I know that my grandmother Louise, my mom Susan and my aunt Cecile (Irene’s mom) and my aunt Theresa are all excited about helping to make the marrying couples’ day a great success. I know also that the food will be fantastic with these women assisting with the feast.
Weddings are major events in Attawapiskat and everyone gets involved in the excitement and energy of two people getting married. These are the modern-day weddings that happen in churches with ceremonies very much like those anywhere else in Canada. Usually, in Attawapiskat, the school gym is used for the reception, supper and dance. Almost everybody shows up for this celebration. After all it is a close-knit community.
After thinking for a while about this topic of weddings, I began to wonder what it was like in the early days, before religion and before the coming of the Europeans. I decided to give a friend, Betty Lincez, a wonderful Aboriginal artist, a call. Luckily, for me she was being visited by several people from up the coast and one of them, Paul Wesley of Kashechewan, agreed to give me some information from a traditional perspective.
He expained that in the early days, a young Cree man had to prove to his own family that he was capable of living on his own, surviving and raising a family before he could think of taking a mate. Once a man had proven his capability then he could proceed to the family of a woman he admired to ask for permission to take her as a wife. The woman’s family would consider whether their daughter was ready to be with this man and if she could perform all the necessary tasks to make the union a success. When both families had time to think this over and the young man and woman had time to conisder this change in their lives, a decision would be made.
Once the decision was made to go ahead with the wedding a ceremony was prepared and conducted by a medicine man or Elder in the community. This event would include the pipe ceremony and also the giving of gifts by the groom to the bride. Once the ceremony was completed, the celebration started with feasting, singing, dancing and games. This celebration lasted four days.
Although the new couple started a new life, they were still very much a part of the community and their education in parenting and surviving and succeeding in this union was ongoing by parents, grandparents and the community at large.
I know that Irene and Ashley will have the best of both worlds in a modern-dayceremony and the care, affection and assistance from their families and the communitythey live in. It is my hope that their love will take them through the ups and downs ofmarried living, smoothly and for a very long, prosperous and satisfying life together.
