As I summon up all the memories that I have about elections, one thing is certain – Canadians either love to vote, hate to vote, or just don’t care about the vote for an upcoming election, it all depends on who you talk to. The people I know don’t seem to care about who wins, as long as they get what they want from the elected officials. So, I’ve composed a wish list of things I want politicians to do if they actually listened to me, the voter.
1) Don’t deny everything that went wrong in the past, just bring it up and confess before you think of running. First of all, it would probably perk up a few ears to learn just what you have to get out of your system and into the mainstream media system. Don’t forget, today, it takes seconds for the ugly truths to come out on any social network and be disseminated around the world, so be honest and tell the truth.
2) Don’t be afraid to face the music, if you don’t like what happens after the election turns in your favour and you actually win. Remember, most people will either look up to you to work your ass off for them and the favours you promised or the majority will find flaws in you and your life in general. Some politicians fear this scenario and hide from the public. But hey, once a politician becomes an elected official, you are a public figure. Many people have voted just to make sure that what they want or need is carried out by a strong leader, not someone who has to hide every time something suspicious pops up about your past or current doings.
3) Try not to make enemies of your constituents. After all, it is they who will get you in there if you are on their side.
4) Put a person behind that smiling face on every telephone post. People like to know that you are a real person.
5) Most of all, try to get people to come out and vote, since most do not vote, due either to apathy or they just don’t know whose face is on the poster.
6) Create diversions from your competition to look towards you. If it is confrontational, then play the game with the competitor. People like a good nasty verbal outlet, so the harder you froth at the mouth during heated debates, the more convincing you are. Just make sure what you’re raving about concerns the general public and not world domination, for example.
7) Don’t be afraid of the things that can’t hurt you and do be afraid of those little things that will come back to haunt you, like previous firings, election fraud, voter bribery, thuggery, any organized crime figures or their escorts, a black leather Harley fetish or previously lobbying for that strip joint which just so happens to be conveniently down the street from your office.
8) Do change your clothes to prove that you can support your own taste in apparel, otherwise, your look will be timelessly enshrined in everyone’s memories as that plaid-shirt dude.
9) Don’t forget every vote counts, even yours. You could be a tie-breaker in your own election campaign.
10) This year, show up and vote. Vote for the party that will best suit your needs, not the party’s needs.