This is a homage to those who attend meetings in places other than Cree communities. I decided to dedicate my participation in this issue to those poor unfortunate wretches whom we rarely see in communities, those who must travel, travel and travel continuously just to attend meetings, go to boring conferences and any other (official or unofficial) business.

I’ve sat down on the crapper after my numerous coffee breaks have given me diarrea verbal and otherwise and wrote a song for you poor wandering souls. Worry not, for in my research I found out that you aren’t sent out merely because nobody wants to see your face in the Cree communities, you aren’t sent out because you’re considered valuable for your party animal skills (except for…) at meetings, in short at times you aren’t being sent out for any reason at all. This song is dedicated to you and should be sung to Rod Stewarts megahit “Do Ya Think I’m Sexy?”

Do Ya Think I’m Busy?

Do ya think I’m busy?

Gotta get my money

Gotta catch a plane, soon…

Some days, it gets a little blurry,

That’s because I’m in such a hurry,

Gotta end, this meeting, soon…

Do ya think I’m busy

Gotta spend ma money

Gotta win tonight (in the casino), soon

Come morning, waiting for a quorum, Where’s the chair, to get moving That’s OK, we’ll defer until tomorrow,

Just so long, as my expenses are good…

Do ya think I’m busy

As I watch my movie

In my expensive hotel room

Don’t worry, we’ll decide soon

Who’ll get the money and who’ll lose it too

Just so long as I raise my hand

And second that motion too….

Do ya think I’m busy

Spending all ma money

Win or lose, at casino royale….

Do ya think I’m busy

Gotta get more money

Gotta catch a plane soon.

Say, who’s this?

Oh, it’s just my family

Didn’t know that my baby turned two

Do ya think I’m busy

Gatta do ma claim now,

Gotta get back on the plane soon…

Wow, stuff you can come up with but there are some strange coincidences you notice going through life whenever there are large groups of people doing the conference thang. Here’s the short list ($9.99 will get you the long list, great to read on long plane rides.):

-the opening speech is often lengthy and promising, and is either tear jerking, inspirational and pleasing, yet has nothing to do with the conference…

-no matter how many times we take “crisis management workshops’ it never sinks in until it’s too late…

-the bar is the only places deals are made, then forgotten…

-you never call the person who gives you their business card and never see them until the next crisis management workshop next year…

-conferences on taxes get the most attendance even though we don’t have to pay taxes…

-reports on the conferences are usually photocopies of the agenda…

-the best part of the conference is the closing ceremony dinner and party…

-the most important business is conducted before boarding time, when you’ve only got one minute….

And I’m outta time, do ya think I’m busy???